Movie Review: The Cabin in the Woods
Running time: 114 minutes
Rating: R (under 17 not admitted without parent or guardian).
Overall rating: 4 stars ‘Deliciously horrifying, spectacularly funny. what the world would be like if Republican’s were in the white house. (You’d have to watch the movie to understand that).
Last night, the entire Daily News gang headed out to see The Cabin in the Woods. At first, we were a bit skeptical because of the overly hyped reviews that some sites had done on it but after actually having watched it with an open mind we definitely had to agree with what some other critics had to say.
The movie starts out rather simple when 5 friends are shown in their college dormitory preparing to go on a vacation or as Marty calls it ‘going off the grid for a few days’ to a remote cabin in the woods. Little did the gang know, that the cabin is actually sort of a C.I.A ran cabin that kills people by use of ‘Zombies’.
Each of the 5 people has something unique about them throughout the entire movie. One being a jock, a brainiac, a whore, and a ‘genius’, if you decide to actually head out to see this movie pay attention to what each person is the movie is almost like a puzzle slowly putting itself together.
Almost instantly one of the first immediate highlights of the movie is when Marty is introduced, the gangs resident pipe smoker. [lol, literally has the biggest bong I've ever seen in my life]. Not even a short 10 minutes into the movie, the gang heads out for the cabin and the adventure begins.
One might wonder why the crew continued to make way for the cabin even though the GPS couldn’t exactly pinpoint it’s location. What’s even stranger is the fact that not one of them noticed that there was let’s call it a ‘wall’ in the middle of the canyon they crossed over that would eventually entrap them all in the vicinity leading to their untimely deaths.
Per the usual ‘drunken comedy’ this point in the movie provides the hilarity we all love in scary movies. The stereotypical drunken jock only wanting to get in the pretty whores pants [and she's drunk enough to do it]. Who remembers truth or dare? Such a hilarious [yet kind of hot moment in this movie].
The game of truth or dare was probably my favorite part of the movie, wait scratch that, no it wasn’t. My favorite part of the movie was the ‘invisible two way mirror’ that the scholar guy could see through. Ladies, don’t even deny it, we all know we were drooling over his body.
Sadly, the movie went from comical to fun to scary in less than 20 seconds. The gang then decided to venture into the cellar where they discovered items from a previous family who lived there [about 100 years] that were murdered in their own home.
The items found in the room were actually intentionally placed there by the people monitoring the home all together. Items like a globe like ball, a journal, a necklace, and a weapon all coincided with how each person would die.
To not spoil the entire movie, it ends here. Overall, we recommend seeing it. It’s a satirical/horror movie at it’s best and definitely worth the watch if you remember the movie ‘Scary Movie 2′.