Rough day for this public masturbating pooper
In Florida, the state where just about everything seems to happen — you have a little of everybody. Public poopers, masturbators, baby killers, and naked people; rarely is one ever the whole package. Enter: Gregory Matthew Bruni, a man who decided he wanted to spend his afternoon yesterday public pooping, masturbating, and drinking the contents of a vacuum cleaner.
Let’s recap the allegations police have against Bruni:
- Got naked, climbed onto the Lands’ roof.
- Attacked Tony Land by jumping on him and hitting his shoulder.
- Ran into Lands’ house, knocked down a TV and spilled the contents of a vacuum on the floor.
- Dodged bullets fired by LaDonna Land.
- Masturbated in the living room.
- Rubbed clothes on his face in the Lands’ son’s room.
- Defecated on the floor in two places.
- Drank the contents of the vacuum.
When Tony and LaDonna Land decided to be home for a day, they probably got a little more than they bargained for. In 9-1-1 calls, Tony can be heard delivering quite a speech to the responder after spotting a naked man inside of his house.
“I don’t know who the hell he is — he’s naked and he ran into my damn house,” Tony can be heard saying on the recording.
At some point during an altercation after Bruni reportedly jumped off of Land’s roof, he sucked up the contents of a vacuum cleaner that had been nearby and spit it out.
Florida police on an attempt to retrieve comment, couldn’t speak without bursting into fits of laughter.
Related articles
- Florida cops Taser naked burglar who pooped and masturbated when homeowner pulled a gun (rawstory.com)
- Gregory Matthew Bruni Arrested For Naked, Violent, Defecating, Masturbating Rampage (thehollywoodgossip.com)
- Naked Man Burglarizes and Defecates in Home (foxcharlotte.com)
- Like something out of a Coen brothers’ script (hanskcjournal.wordpress.com)
- Florida cops Taser naked burglar who pooped and masturbated when homeowner pulled a gun (sott.net)
- Naked Florida Man Jumps Off Roof Onto Man, Knocks Television Over, Empties Vacuum Cleaner, Masturbates (gawker.com)
[...] Rough day for this public masturbating pooper (bazaardaily.com) [...]